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Posts for December 2003 (4 entries)

What once was flowers and puppy dogs

18th December 2003, early evening | Comments (11)

Funny how greetings cards have altered since I was a kid. It used to be that any card you bought had to have a strong flower or motor car or loveable-puppy motif; but now I can go to Woolworths and buy my Grandma a birthday card with some bloke’s hairy arse on it (and she’ll like it)…

View this post in full (69 words, 3 images).

The ginger line continues

10th December 2003, lunch time | Comments (9)

Well done people.

  1. #katmeyer {
  2. cursor: only-during-birth;
  3. position: recumbent;
  4. size: 50%;
  5. }
  6.  
  7. #ericmeyer {
  8. orphans: none;
  9. widows: none;
  10. }
  11.  
  12. #katmeyer:first-child,
  13. #ericmeyer:first-child {
  14. background: url('http://www.meyerweb.com/pix/2003/eskimo-kiss.jpg');
  15. bottom: dry;
  16. clip: none;
  17. color: #FCC2F3;
  18. display: proudly;
  19. hair-color: inherit;
  20. marks: none;
  21. quotes: "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!";
  22. }
  23. Download this code: 70a.txt

I will now count backwards from ten

5th December 2003, the wee hours | Comments (15)

Getting your message across to the browsing-public is a tough job for web site owners: reading on-screen is far from optimal; connection speeds are still slow here in the UK; and with the average user’s attention span being smaller than my pen is (it's a very small pen), a web site owner has to work hard to retain a visitor beyond those first few seconds…

View this post in full (376 words, 2 images).

God is in the typos

1st December 2003, early evening | Comments (14)

I am currently experiencing the less-than-delightful side of being a programmer on a deadline — no sleep and no food has turned me in to a shivering wreck, and for some reason I’ve developed hyper-sensitive hearing in to the bargain — even the air sounds loud. It’s very odd.

It was in this slightly harried mental state that I found myself reading a line of code I’d written earlier today:

  1. // if all is god then insert info into database
  2. Download this code: 66a.txt

if all is god…

What can that mean?

Is The Almighty contacting me through the power of PHP comments? Has my slight dyslexia become a channel for Jesus? Will crazy people from the American Mid-West flock to see my typos: He wrote run query — it’s a sign Jesus wants gay people chased out of Heaven!*

Is my shaking the onset of a religious experience? Are my mis-spelt words a literary form of speaking in tongues? Is my amazing hearing indicative of finding Jesus, or the first steps to becoming a Super Hero? Or do I simply need some sleep and a bite to eat?

Whatever the reason turns out to be, it better not get in the way of this deadline…

*That’s the crazy people talking btw, not me. As far as I’m concerned gay people can hang out in heaven as much as they like… just don’t paint it pink or anything, OK?